Another Texas Family

She’s Legally Ours!

Written on May 18, 2012 in Adoption, Down Syndrome

Yesterday marked the end of the legal waiting period before Hazel Olechka would be declared our daughter!! So it’s official, the court decree is available to pick up, and we’re well on our way to having her home as our daughter! I wish she knew how special today is-that she is now part of a family to call her own.

Justin leaves next week to start all the crazy paperwork and Embassy visits, and it looks as if he’ll get her from the orphanage May 29th or 30th. He’s promised me to take lots of pictures and keep me updated so I can update the blog!

Their return flights have been booked and they will land in TX together in 2 weeks on Friday June 1st!!! If anyone wants to join us at the airport that afternoon for some celebrating let me know!

The Presence of Orphans

Written on May 16, 2012 in Adoption, Down Syndrome

“The presence of orphans in this world is evidence that God’s world-the world that He described as “very good”-has been violated and corrupted by sin. This is the world we live in.” Author Unknown

We’re Still Here!

Written on May 13, 2012 in Adoption, Family Fun

Sorry to leave everyone hanging after my last post, but it’s been a whirlwind week! We’ve only been home 5 days, yet it feels like we were in Eastern Europe so long ago. Almost as if it were a dream.

Hours before we boarded the plane to head home we found out about the sudden death of a mentor and friend of the past ten years, Art King. He and his wife Lylabeth (and his son’s music) were just such an encouragement while we were in country. We sat in our hotel room and just cried over losing such a great man who taught us so much as a young couple. We will never forget him telling us 9 years ago “children are born little sinners.” We’ve never forgotten it! We are still in shock and mourning his death.

We arrived back at our house Tuesday afternoon to our kids waiting in our driveway. They were beyond excited to see us and it was so good to give them big hugs. Oh, how we missed our kids. They seemed to grow so much in 3 weeks! Granger asked us “Where’s Baby Hazel?” Poor man doesn’t quite understand.

Some friends from church watched over our house and mowed our grass while away, so imagine our surprise when we got home and saw they bought us groceries and stocked our fridge! Our church family continuously amazes me with their selfless giving. It was great to be back at church this morning as we missed corporate worship desperately. It was so refreshing to see our church family and fellowship with those who are excited to share this adoption journey with us. I am extremely grateful for the groceries since I was a zombie the first few days. The jet lag has been much harder on me coming back, but I think I’m finally recovering.

Since arriving home we have spent our time enjoying our kids, unpacking and repacking, doing laundry, catching up on sleep, and working on our massive to-do list. Justin’s return flights have been booked and he leaves next week! Leaving Hazel behind was very difficult, but the Lord has given me much peace this week and she’ll be here before we know it!

Lastly, Happy Mother’s Day to my mom who I love dearly. You are my best friend and I love you beyond words.

And Happy Mother’s Day to my mother-in-law who raised an amazing husband and father (and watched our kids for 3 weeks)! I can’t thank you enough!

Our Court Appearance

Written on May 8, 2012 in Adoption

Praise the Lord O My Soul, Praise the Lord!

By the time most of you read this, we will be over the Atlantic Ocean and on our way back to Texas. I wanted to re-cap our court appointment yesterday since many of you were praying for us. After the events of the day unfolded our facilitator and driver said, “You guys are lucky.” But Justin and I are confident it wasn’t luck, but the body of believers we called on to lift us up in prayer and pray for a miracle. I was able to tell our facilitator, “No, we were praying for a miracle.” Praise God!

To spare the details, we were waiting on an important paper in the capital to be signed before we could have court. Since our region is so close to the capital it was possible to have the paper signed and still have it to our region in time for court. There was just one huge problem; the guy to sign the papers was not there when he said he was going to be. So we were sitting at the courthouse just praying it could be signed and get to the courthouse before the day’s end. That’s when many of you were waking up and saw on facebook us asking for prayers. So, thank you for lifting us up and believing it could happen!

We were incredibly nervous for court (or at least I was). When we walked in and saw the judge I started sweating, my heart started racing, and I just asked the Holy Spirit to give us the words to say. There was the judge, a prosecutor (to protect the rights of the children), a child services representative, two jury members, and our translator. From start to finish it lasted about 45 minutes. The entire time I was sitting there palpitating I kept thinking that one day I would be standing before our Heavenly Father being judged for my time on this earth. I can’t imagine how nervous I will be then!

The judge started by asking Justin the bulk of the questions. He asked about his education, work, finances, his job’s stability, and then he asked what led us to adopt a child with special needs. I am so proud of how Justin answered and did not shy away from the Truth. He talked about our miscarriage and how the Lord led us to special needs adoption and how we feel all children are made in the image of God. He talked about our wonderful church family and our faith in God, and then about the community we live in that has many resources available (doctors, specialists, therapists, support groups, etc.). The judge then asked him if we were ‘obligated’ by our religion and church to adopt this child. Justin explained that no one has obligated us to do this, but it’s something we desire and want! Again, most people in Hazel’s country do not understand why we would desire to adopt a child with special needs.

He then moved to me. The judge kept his questions pretty short, but one jury member really hounded me with the questions. The judge asked about my educational background and when I told him I had a BS and MS in Nutrition and I now stay at home he said, “Wow, you’ve really wasted your education.” I smiled and replied, ‘No sir, I use it on my kids and husband every day!’ I was able to redeem myself later when the jury member asked me if I hire help and I replied ‘No’, and then she said “Well, how do you have time to get everything done? Laundry, housework, keeping up with your kids?” I said, ‘My husband helps me and I stay-at-home. That’s why I have chosen to stay at home.’ What I really wanted to say is “Who DOES have the time to get it all done? NO ONE!”

And then that same jury member alluded to the fact that I was going to be “stuck at home all day with this new ‘load’ while my husband was away all day making money”. Justin politely told her that this new child would come with more work, but we do not view her as a ‘load’ and he helps me around the house a lot when he is home.

We were able to show them a photo book I made on Snapfish of our kids, house, the nursery, our extended family, and vacations. They really enjoyed it and I am glad I had a chance to show them our real life.

We were dismissed from the court room so the judge and jury could make their decision. 15 minutes later we were called back in and granted our requests to be named the parents of Hazel Olechka! There is a legal waiting period before we are able to pick up the court decree and take her from the orphanage, which is why we are headed back home. Justin will return in a few weeks to do all the official paperwork (passports, visa, birth certificates, medical examine), and then he will get her from the orphanage and head home! Thank you SO much for the encouragement and the prayers the past 3 weeks.

We can’t thank you all enough, as you’ve all played a huge part in our journey. We look forward to sharing Hazel’s homecoming and integration into our family.

Day 16: Saying Goodbye

Written on May 6, 2012 in Adoption, Down Syndrome

Since we are still anticipating court tomorrow, today was our last day to spend with Hazel. Justin will be returning alone the second trip so this was my last chance to see her before she is home in our arms.

We thoroughly enjoyed our last day at the orphanage with this beautiful little girl.

Look at her sitting for a brief moment! She couldn’t do this 12 days ago. It’s amazing what some one-on-one loving can do.

It was a bittersweet day for me. I didn’t even bother wearing make-up. The tears flowed and my heart was full of grief as we had to walk away and leave her there.

It hurt to tell Hazel goodbye and return her to her crib, yet I ache for our kids back home.

I feel like my heart is torn between two places, but I know a glorious day is approaching for Hazel. A magnificent day that she is unaware of, but that will change the course of her life forever. Oh, what a celebrated day it will be when Hazel is taken out of the four walls of that orphanage and forever a part of our family.

One day will we share more about our experience here at the orphanage. It’s been an emotional roller coaster that we were not expecting or prepared to experience, and one that will forever change us spiritually.

“I love you, O Lord, my strength, the Lord is my rock and my fortress, and my deliverer, my God, my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield, and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.” Psalm 18:1-2

Day 15: Winding Down the Days

Written on May 5, 2012 in Adoption

We are still scheduled for court Monday here in region, but we are waiting on an important piece of paper to be signed and we will not know if it’s been signed until Monday. We have our travel agent on stand-by in case our flights need to be re-scheduled, but hopefully they do not. Unfortunately, that means our time with Hazel this trip is coming to an end.

It’s been a hard few days emotionally, but we are trying to soak up every minute with Hazel that we can. We hope and pray for a short 2^nd trip and to have her home in Texas with us in 3 weeks.

We’ve enjoyed our time in Hazel’s birth country and there are some things we are definitely going to miss:

The Ice Cream (more like whipped cream)

The friendly people we’ve met

Our nightly dates at the pizza parlor (although we are tired of pizza after eating it 12 days in a row!)

Our driver Serge, who doesn’t speak a lick of English, but has been a great blessing (and has endured us butchering the language)

The history of this country

The slow pace of life

But there are some things we will NOT miss:

Boiling our water, the crazy driving and lack of seat belts, washing our clothes in the bathtub and hanging them to dry (which then results in stiff and crunchy undergarments), the sun rising at 4:30 a.m., and communicating through charades!

What we look forward to the most in returning to the States is: embracing our kids after 3 weeks without them, washing and drying all our travel clothes, and eating Mexican food! However, all the comforts of home do not bring comfort in leaving Hazel here. Saying goodbye tomorrow is going to be torturous. Not long baby girl and you’ll have a family forever.

Day 14: Love ME More

Written on May 4, 2012 in Adoption, Faith

One of the most difficult parts of our international adoption journey has been leaving our kids back home. In fact, when we felt the Lord moving us to international special needs adoption we told one another and God we would only commit to it if we could bring the kids along with us. We should have known better than to bargain with God.

Fast forward 6 months after much back and forth on the decision to bring them or not, and after a considerable amount of praying, we decided to leave them in the States. It was a tough decision for us and not an easy one, but one that we knew God would give us much mercy and comfort in. Ultimately, it was the right decision although a very hard one. Anyone who knows me is surprised I actually left our kids when it came time to leave.

As I’ve talked with many moms about international adoption I often hear, ‘I would love to adopt internationally, but I could NEVER leave my kids.’

Believe me, WE KNOW. We said the same thing 6 short months ago and we have cried many times as we miss them more than you can imagine.

However, during this time the Lord has drawn us to His Word to bring comfort and expose the sins of our hearts.

The Lord commands us in His Word to love Him with all our hearts, souls, and mind (Matthew 22:37). We fail daily at loving the Lord with all of our being, and we have been guilty many times of making our children idols and loving them more than God. When we were praying and struggling through our decision to bring our children our hearts were torn, but we felt the Lord whispering ‘Love ME more than them.’

‘Love MY ways more than your ways.’

‘Take up your cross and follow ME’

Matthew 10:37 says “Whoever loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me, and whoever loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me. And whoever does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me.”

The Lord has called us to this hard place of suffering without our kids, but in this hard place He is with us, giving much comfort through his living Word and fellowship with the Holy Spirit. He asked us to joyfully love Him above ALL else in this world, even our family.

Yes, it has been extremely difficult, but it has been worth every minute. We would do it a million times over for any of our children and in joyful obedience to the Lord.

As we prepare for our court date soon, please pray that we would be bold in proclaiming our reason for adopting, and that we would love HIM more than our fears.

Day 13: The Bonding Continues

Written on May 3, 2012 in Adoption, Down Syndrome

The days just keep getting better with our baby girl. She’s getting more and more comfortable with us and just smiles when we stick our head in her groupa every day.

We stayed inside this morning and played our little hearts out.

We found her ticklish spot!

And much to our surprise, they put baby girl in shorts this afternoon and sent us outside to play!

I took advantage of the shorts and tried to expose her little legs to some Vitamin D!

As usual, she fell asleep during a stroll around the orphanage grounds.

If you’ve ever asked if you could love an adopted child as much as your biological children-YES, you can!

Day 12: Bows & Bubbles

Written on May 2, 2012 in Adoption, Down Syndrome

What a wonderful day it has been! This morning it was a little colder outside, so the nannies asked us to stay inside. Yay!! We were really excited to finally get down on the ground and play with Hazel, AND to put a bow in her hair!

This afternoon the weather was gorgeous so we headed outside and had a great time enjoying Miss Hazel again.

Yes, LOVE the bow!

Today was probably our best day yet. We laughed, talked, danced, and played.

My friend Alicia from Sweetish Baby made this adorable hat for Hazel. Love it!

We introduced her to bubbles recently and she has been mesmerized by them.

And now for our absolute favorite part of the day (and trip). I brought my IPOD along to play some music for Hazel since she loves it when Justin sings to her. Oh my goodness, she LOVED it.

She was over-the-top excited!

We saw many faces we have never seen before!

Looks like Miss Hazel already knows how to praise the Lord! Here she is dancing to Ross King. Enjoy!

Day 11: The Fate of Orphans with Special Needs

Written on May 1, 2012 in Adoption, Down Syndrome, Faith

This post is so hard to write and to convey in words the emotions we feel. Since we started on the international adoption route our eyes have been opened to many things, one of them being what happens to children with special needs when they are too old for an orphanage that houses babies. We had heard many horror stories of children phasing out of orphanages and being sentenced to a cruel and tormenting life in a mental institution. We read these stories and heard the pleas from adoption advocates to adopt these children before the age of 4; however, it wasn’t until our time here that we learned the whole truth and heard firsthand the devastating fate of special needs orphans.

It was over pizza with our facilitator that we heard the disturbing facts of children like our little Hazel in this society.

Most ‘baby house’ orphanages hold children 0-4 years old and then at the age of 4 the ‘normal’ children are transferred to an orphanage for older kids. Orphans with special needs (Down Syndrome, cerebral palsy, spina bifida, etc.) are sent to a mental institution where most children with Down Syndrome die by the age of 8 years old from lack of care. They are literally given a death sentence.

We were told that in Eastern Europe children with Down Syndrome are seen as animals—they are viewed as imbeciles that simply eat, sleep, and breath. They have no life outside of merely being and have no hope for amounting to anything.

There are no resources available to help them in this society and keeping a baby with a disability is highly looked down upon, which is why many of them are abandoned in the maternity ward of hospitals and then sent to orphanages.

Once in a mental institution they really are treated like animals. Hearing this penetrated our hearts deeply. Oh Lord Jesus, please come and end this tragedy.

Now, before you point the finger at Eastern Europe and say ‘Shame on You’, do not think for one moment that America has it all figured out. No! America is a pitiful and poor example of how to treat children with special needs because we just kill all of ours before they are born.

90% of babies with Down Syndrome are aborted in the United States.

Did you get that?! Only 1 out of 10 are given a chance at life.

It’s a silent and overlooked holocaust on babies like Hazel.

Both are a tragedy and a direct result of the fallen nature of man. Neither will change until the Gospel is the center point of why we do the things we do AND until the Gospel is explained as the reason why we make the choices we do.

Matthew 25:40 “And the King will answer them, ‘Truly I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.”

We are so thankful that people here are asking us why. Our facilitator told us over and over, “The people here do not understand why you Americans come and adopt special needs children.” Until we explain to them WHY, they will never fully understand.

We urge you, as followers of Christ, look for opportunities to share the Gospel and why we make the choices we do.

Why do we choose to say no to prenatal testing?

Why do we choose to keep a baby that is imperfect by the world’s standards?

Why do we support adoption?

Why adopt a child with special needs?

And continue in prayer for the unborn to be saved, 140+ million orphans worldwide, and for followers of Christ to step up to proclaiming the Gospel through adoption!

Psalm 139: 15-16 says “My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth, Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.”

Here are just a fraction of the beautiful children with special needs available for adoption. I pray they are not given a death sentence for being wonderfully and perfectly made in the eyes of our Savior.

Juliette